Recent goings-on

 

Finally playing in the sun!

Soaking each other.

Annabelle's new chore chart...helps mommy as much as it helps Annabelle!

Playing "dress-up"

Eating lunch in the house before all our stuff came over.

The "trailer" that arrived with all of our stuff!

Annabelle helping Nora take her shoes off

My beautiful birthday card and mug from my girls.

Just being beautiful

Watching the trains at the end of the street. Annabelle doesn't like when they stop!

 

Got my hair chopped!

 

Posted with Blogsy

Life in the fast lane

My dad has been singing this song to me since I was very little. And the lyrics couldn't be more fitting as they have been the last 3 weeks.

Joel lost his job. And it hit us, as I'm sure it does anyone, like a ton of bricks. We were reeling. What direction should we go? Where should we live? What should we do? Should I look for work? Should we move in with my parents in Chicago?

Joel began to question his career path, considering sales, insurance, custom furniture.

Along the way, we had glimpses of promise. Within days, Joel had a job offer from his old company. But it would have been another move far from anyone we know, and we made a choice to stay put for the time being.

Then we would get blind-sided. The owners of the home we were meant to purchase wanted to take us to court. Thankfully, after weeks of wrangling, all has settled down.

And then, life began to move at lightning speed! Joel received a job offer from a local company. We accepted joyfully and began to look on Craigslist for a place to rent. Within 24 hours, we had keys in hand to a cute little ranch, with a 4 month minimum lease! We couldn't have planned it better ourselves. Within days, we were moved in, and mostly, unpacked. It is amazing how quickly things can change.

The hardest part of the journey: our wrestling with God. Joel felt called to West Bend and it was a hard blow when we realized that some of the doors we saw closing on houses became clear with him losing his job. So, we questioned, why?

I am not sure we will ever know. We lost sanity and a few dollars in all the transactions. Joel travelled and missed time with us. We sold our home. But I can't tell you how grateful we are feeling now. West Bend never charmed us and we were not sad to be able to stay with our friends and family in the Fox Valley.

This scripture gave me comfort as we wrestled through those days.

Don't bargain with God. Be direct. Ask for what you need. This isn't a cat-and-mouse, hide-and-seek game we're in. If your child asks for bread, do you trick him with sawdust? If he asks for fish, do you scare him with a live snake on his plate? As bad as you are, you wouldn't think of such a thing. You're at least decent to your own children. So don't you think the God who conceived you in love will be even better? -Matthew 7:7-11 (Message)

He is even better. We just don't always see His plan. Grateful, only now as we look back, for all that we have learned in this process. It was painful and gut-wrenching and I never want to go through it again. But grateful for the understanding we gained in the process.

Posted with Blogsy

Facebook perfect family

On paper, or Facebook, it can appear that I have the perfect family, perfect children. And I want to clear that up right away.

Nope, no way. Not a freaking chance.

Right before all the food went on the floor

I post pictures and stories of my children because they bring me joy and I know I have family and friends that love watching my girls grow up. I tend to neglect the stories of temper tantrums, sibling rivalry, thrown food, missed milestones, and tears that go on forever. From the girls and me. I refuse to drag my Facebook community through that. I'm sure they have plenty of that in their own lives.

 

My kids both suck their thumbs

But I also don't want anyone to think things here are easy. It has been an incredibly difficult few months. I have yelled at my girls more than I like to admit. My girls have struggled to understand all the change around them. It is so hard when we don't know when, or if, the girls will see daddy every night. Joel spends 2.5 hours in the car every day. We have snapped at each other. We have snapped at the girls.

Some days we are barely holding it together.

The moments that get posted to Facebook make the other moments manageable.

Nora doesn't like when she gets hugs from Annabelle, which doesn't happen that often anyway

My children are about as normal as they come. One step forward, one step back. Huge accomplishments, big setbacks.

My parenting is about as normal as it comes. I don't read parenting books. I don't always remember to pray for them, with them, or before meals. My discipline can be inconsistent. Right now, the girls are watching Netflix.

The bright light they're staring at was playing princess movies

I have always promised to be honest with my parenting. That is what my mom taught me. It is okay to say sorry. I have a feeling I will be saying that to my girls for the rest of their lives. And that is good news. I want to be the perfect parent, the perfect family. But the reality is I am not, and we are not, and that is a heavy burden that I don't want to bear.

Instead, my girls will learn that perfection isn't possible or necessary.

So, Facebook friends and family, please don't ever assume that we have anything figured out. We love our girls to the best of our ability in the moment we are in. And we pray for grace upon grace.

 

Posted with Blogsy

Potty Training

Let's be clear about 2 things from the beginning. I do not claim to be an expert on potty training, and my daughter has always proven to transition well. I can not take credit for that.

With those things out of the way, here's my story.

I had a baby. Well, 2, but that's beside the point. When my oldest was 19 months, my youngest was born. At that time it seemed like all of my oldest's friends' moms were beginning to talk about potty training...at 19 months! I stated firmly and repeatedly, "I'm just not ready for that and neither is she". Okay, mostly I wasn't ready to take her to the bathroom every 30 minutes while trying to feed the other one every 2 hours.

So, the extent of our potty training came down to buying her a potty (around 18 months) and putting it where she could see it in the bathroom. (I did stash some Elmo underpants away, just in case). Over the next year, she peed in it a couple times and pooped once...all mostly by accident. We were determined not to potty train until we felt like she was truly ready (helpful advice from a very wise lady I like to call "mom").

About the time the baby was 9 months old, my husband took a new job about an hour and 15 minutes away and began commuting while we attempted to sell our house.

Our house sold (thank God) and with no house on the horizon, we began to pack up for a move to my father-in-law's house. That is conversation for another day.

One evening, my daughter was asking a lot of questions about the potty. She clearly knew what it was for, but was unsure about it's exact place in her life. The next morning I woke up with a vague thought to potty train her. And so it happened, as it often does in my life, that the day had arrived.

I had heard stories of friends potty training their kids and was not looking forward to it. I had also heard of just putting them in underpants and letting her guide the process. Seeing as how I don't like charts and anything very difficult, and I only had 3 days before our house was to be overcome by boxes, I determined to do it.

When she woke up, I surprised her with her new underpants and off we went. We had wood floors, a bucket full of towels, and blind-stupidity. And somehow, it worked! I spent the first day and a half following her around with a stopwatch and the potty. After only a few accidents, I realized she got it. The stopwatch became a source of contention, so I let it go. After that, I did remind her often, but didn't force her to sit down unless we needed to go somewhere (which we didn't do for 3 days) or she was walking around on tiptoes (her tell-tale sign she needed to go).

Yes, we had pee on the floor. Yes, we had poop in the underwear. But since we started, I can count the number of times this happened on my hands.

She was ready, even though she never said so. I just knew my kid well enough to know that she was smart enough to get it.

It was definitely not easy. She is still in pull-ups at nap and bedtime (and I have no thoughts as to when we will begin to phase that out, but I'm hoping to live in my own house by then). Both mom and daughter have had good cries and a few meltodowns (yes, both of us). But, it is done.

And, as often her around our house, "Annabelle, do you need to go potty?".

Her favorite response, "Nope, not quite yet."

To Nora, on your 1st birthday

To my baby girl,

As you turn one year old, all I can think is, thank God.

Thank God you are here. You were a gift from the start and your first year has brought so much joy. Sometimes I even call you my joy-bucket. You just overflow with sweetness.

When you wake up from sleep, and I go in your room, I am met with a smile and your arms waving wildly. That is how you approach life. Joyful and excited.

And yet when I pick you up, you tuck your arms in and lay your head on my shoulder.

That doesn't last long. You let nothing stop you and have already figured out how to climb the stairs, drink from your sister's cups, and have taken a few steps. But it is your "zombie" crawl that lights up everyone's faces.

Thank God for you, my little sweetness. You crawl over to me and snuggle your head into my lap. You hold on tight to my arm in unfamiliar circumstances. You giggle with delight when Annabelle wakes up from a long nap. You march. You tickle your own belly. You clink glasses and love when we yell "cheers". You love life and people.

You make people happy.

And I love you. You are hysterical, joyful, energetic, sweet, sassy, smart, and loving. You love your sister with an unwavering heart no matter what. You make your way into the middle of her space and demand her attention, and her love. You are also over the moon about your daddy. There is nothing sweeter in the world than your smile for him.

Little lady, I am so blessed to have you as my baby. I will hold you as tightly as you'll let me for as long as you'll allow.

My prayer for you as that you will fall passionately in love with your Father and serve Him with all your joy and energy. He loves you more than I do. And I'm not sure it's possible to fathom how much that could be.

Happy 1 year, Nora! I love you. Mama.

Posted with Blogsy

Perspective

With the decision for Joel to take a job in West Bend came a whirlwind week of getting the house ready and loads of differing emotions. He quit one job, we skipped a Christmas party to attend his new work Christmas party, we baked Christmas cookies with Grammy, painted the basement, cleaned the house from top to bottom, had 2 showings for the house, and visited Santa. Between all these things, I had a couple good cries, and to be totally honest, a bad attitude. Though we believe God has lead us to this decision, since then, I have been a baby. Appleton has become my home. I will try to blog sometime in the future about that.

Thankfully, God is faithful, even when you are acting like a baby. Here are the 2 messages He has given to me in the last 24 hours.

1) He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Whether in Appleton or West Bend. No matter what kinds of churches they have or don't have. With or without our amazing small group community. He doesn't change.

2) While making waffles with an excited toddler this morning, I realized there will always be this. Warm waffles, coffee, apple slices. And for a little while longer, baby toes, sippy cups, and a few meltdowns to go with it. Nora is crossing milestones off her list as quickly as I can cross them off in the baby book. Annabelle can hold a conversation with you. I don't want to miss these years with worry about a future I can't control.

So, here's to memories in the midst of the seemingly endless chaos. And here's to His strength before I have taken too much time trying to use all of mine.

Posted with Blogsy

60 years

To anyone who knows my dad, please don't share this with him. I will share it with him at his party next weekend.

 

Dear Dad,

As part of the festivities in celebration of your 60th, we were supposed to think about memories. And, as your oldest daughter, I have too many to count.

But as I was reminiscing today, I kept being drawn to the same idea. I have always known that I was Daddy's little girl, but I never once thought I was daddy's little princess.

Don't get me wrong. I was spoiled. Before the cabbage patch doll even made it to America, I had one. Every Christmas, the tree was overwhelmed by a stack of gifts for each of us. I have been to Italy, France, Switzerland, Czech Republic, cruises, Disney, and so much more.

And I always knew I was loved by my daddy-boy. I knew he was the man that would take care of me and be by my side for each new stage of my life.

But thank God, I never considered that I would be daddy's princess. Princesses are waited on hand and foot and never learn to care for themselves. You taught me hard work and risks. You taught me about how to correctly handle money. You taught me how to stand up for myself in a work environment that you probably could have fixed for me. Because of you, I have never been in debt to anyone except you. Though, as a younger girl this may not have been true, I have never felt entitled to anything. You helped me navigate my way through buying my first home, always keeping me focused on what I could afford, not what I wanted to afford. I am a strong, confident woman. And without the love and guidance of my daddy, that would not have been possible.

At every major milestone, you were there, proud of me. The day you dropped me off at college, I will never forget the tears in your eyes as you kissed me goodbye.

And the big one, my wedding day. You made all my dreams come true. And on that day, I knew I could relax and enjoy because you would handle everything. You honored the people who were important to me, you made everyone feel welcome, and most importantly, you made me feel beautiful. I remember standing with you outside those church doors. Anxious as the music played. I took your arm as you led me toward my husband. I didn't dare look too closely at you.

The sweetest moment of all came when you picked out our dance music. Butterfly kisses. You made me feel so special by keeping it a surprise. I tear up now just thinking about it.

Daddy's little girl. And now, Papa's princesses. Annabelle and Nora will always know they are Papa's princesses. And as it should be. Spoil them. Overdue everything. Let loose and dance. Watching you with my daughters is a gift. They adore you and I know the feeling is mutual.

Of course there are the funny stories that we tell over and over again. Our flight to Prague. The first time you met Joel. The music-guessing game I always failed. How about the time I replaced the cord on my dryer and had to hang up on you?! I'm pretty sure you thought I was dead.

You have navigated some tough times recently, and I have had the chance to see your heart. You are loyal and true. You work hard to ensure that everyone has a voice in our family. Thank you.

But one of the most important lessons I have learned from you, and from mom, is commitment. Your marriage may not always be perfect, but I have never doubted your commitment. As the years have turned into decades, you are still there, navigating life together. Thank you isn't enough for the example you have been to me. In a culture that doesn't honor commitment, I have a solid foundation to build my marriage on. I can't express how much worth this has to me.

The best part? The journey continues. More celebrations are to come. Christmases and birthdays. Vacations and trips to the zoo. Swinging. Eating ice cream and pancakes.

My Dad.

My girls' Papa.

Happy 60th birthday! I love you more than words can express.

Forever Daddy's little brown-eyed girl, Your Kate-Lynn

Posted with Blogsy