4 years old!

My 4 year old Boo,

This year Mommy is digging in her heels. There is no way you are 4! That seems like such a big girl. But as I watch you laugh and talk and pretend play and roller skate and ride your bike, I am reminded that you getting to be a big girl. I will give you that.

This year has been a full one! Since your last birthday, we have moved, you started preschool, and then switched to another preschool! You have remained absolutely constant! With only a few small hiccups, you transitioned like a champ. As much as you love your routine, you also enjoy new adventures and new friends.

This year for your birthday you had your first "friend" party. You were gracious and inviting to each of your friends and I was so proud. And then at your family party, you were joyful and gracious again! I LOVE the way you open presents, enjoying each one! 

This coming year will be 4K, 3 days a week. I am truly excited to see what you will learn because you love to learn. Your teachers always say what an engaged and intelligent little girl you are. And all I can think is that you have always been that way. On your first day of life, you had your eyes open and you were checking everyone out. People noticed right away.

I love you, baby girl. Being your mom is such a gift from God. I know He put us together to grow and love. And then he gave us your sister to take care of and enjoy! Your dad and I wouldn't have it any other way. What a wonderful family we have!

Your Mama

A toast to my only sister

I could not be more humbled to be standing here today, as the matron of honor and Carrie’s older sister, Katie, to honor Carrie and Kevin and stand next to them as they begin this journey of marriage together. Thank you all for coming!

Kevin, as I thought about what to share with you I settled on this…thoughts on marrying a Lullo woman. I polled the men in our family and got a few thoughts. Though we are each uniquely different, there are a few things that we hold in common.

1)      We are not shy about our opinions.

a.       Pro: You will always know what is on our minds.

b.      Con: You will always know what is on our minds.

2)      We remember everything.

a.       Pro: You will never forget a commitment, birthday or special memory.

b.      Con: We don’t forget anything. And I mean anything.

3)      We are fiercely loyal.

a.       Pro: You will always know that you have someone on your side.

b.      Con: Don’t even think of breathing a bad word about our family, even if you are just repeating something we just said.

4)      We love with everything we have.

a.       Pro: You will never be without our utmost devotion.

b.      Con: I’m pretty sure there is not one.

And Jerry wanted to be sure to add this: Don’t mess with the brother!

Kevin, as Carrie’s big sister, I have been amazed at your ability to put Carrie’s needs and dreams before your own. You are humble and gentle in spirit and I couldn’t be happier to have you as my brother-in-law.

Carrie. You look stunning and radiate true joy. I am so proud of you for waiting until the right man made his appearance in your life.

Thank you for inviting me into this day to stand beside you. It really is an honor and a privilege. This stage of our lives is so sweet to walk together as sisters, but more importantly, friends.  God chose to put us together in this family, and only time has revealed why.

My all time favorite memories with you and our whole family is when we would get just a bit overtired, and the laughing would start. We would try to stop the giggles but sometimes they would go on and on until someone would let out just the smallest toot and then we would lose it all together.

Between the two of us, we were the keepers of the rules. When we shared a room in California, there was always a clear definition of where your half stopped and started. Unfortunately for me, you had the half with the door and somehow I believed that when you drew the line down the center of the room, I could no longer leave.

But even through all of our pushing and prodding and let’s face it, fighting, we loved each other deeply. The pride I felt when you stepped on the ice was exhilarating. And when you were hooded for your PhD, I cried like a baby.

And today we stand together as wives. We are so blessed to have incredible examples of what a wife is to go before us. Not one would claim to have it right, but I’d say they are pretty darn close.

As I think about what you and Kevin will face in the years to come, I will share with you what Grandma Carpenter shared with me. She told me that the love she felt for Grandpa was stronger and sweeter the older she got. I may have only 6 years into this marriage business, but I would already agree. Know that the love you feel right now will go through its fair share of hard times, some desperately hard. But know this, the love you feel will only grow more true and real with time.

Please raise your glass: To Kevin and Carolyn: may your love age into a love that grows sweeter and truer with time.

On your second birthday, Nora!

My sweetheart,

I love you more than my tongue can tell. And that is an understatement. My heart nearly bursts with love for you.

This last year has been an incredibly tumultuous one for our family. I am so grateful I have had your face to wake up to every morning. With your big sister in school, we have had more time to just be together. Tumbling class, library, wiggle room...what a blast with you!

Your personality is incredible! You are fun, maybe a bit mischievous, but always a joy to have around. At the age of 2, you are already making people laugh, and you are doing it on purpose. That is a gift, sweet child. We didn't know how much we needed you in our house.

It is my absolute joy to be your mother. I love to show you off. You are smart and chatty. At your doctor's appointment yesterday, the doctor said you are advanced in your talking skills. You don't have to tell us that!

We pray for you constantly. For your safety. For your sleep patterns. For your development. For your friendships.

My prayer for you always will be to know your Abba. I want you to know Him intimately as your Heavenly Father. I want you to desire Him above all else. I want you to always see yourself and the world through His eyes.

And somehow, in my heart, I think you already do. May you never lose that. Ever.

I love you up to the sky, to the moon, and the stars...and all the way back.

Love,
Mama

summer going-ons

 

ccoloring...check

one of my bff"s getting engaged...check!

children's museum...check!

clean-up your sis...check!

 

major nose bonk...check!

 

purple cowboy boots...check!

walks...check!

up north...check!

family reunion...check!

 

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On her way

It was a big summer for little Miss Annabelle. She took swim class, went to VBS, and played to her heart's content. But fall is fast approaching. And when you turn 3, that means preschool! Annabelle is going to a simple, 2-day a week, park and rec, preschool. She will love it!

It also means that I get to continue a long-standing Lullo tradition. Pre-school shopping date with Mom. My memories of these dates with my own mom are etched in my memory and the time along with her still makes me feel special. I have been waiting for this day for awhile now and couldn't wait to give her some one-on-one attention. And I had a fun surprise lunch planned for her at the end.

Annabelle picked out as much pink and purple and Hello Kitty as she could for her first day. And, with a little encouragement from her mom, an adorable headband.

On our way in to Macy's!

She insisted on sitting with Abe outside of the mall. (which only begs the question...what is Abe doing outide the mall?)

Getting silly before our special lunch...

I took my big girl out for hibachi (thank you, Groupon). She was not a huge fan of the fire, but loved watching him cook our food. It was such a sweet memory for me because we were the only ones at our table!

Miso Soup!

Fire...

Hiding out (reminding me that she's still a little girl)

In the end, it was a huge success. I love this girl more than chocolate ice cream with cherries on top. And sometimes it takes days like this for me to step back and truly cherish her. She is so smart and definitely beautiful. She notices everything! She is aware of all that is going on around her and loves to process it all externally (no idea where she gets that from!).

I held back tears several times this morning. I love that she's growing up. And I'm so proud of who she is becoming.

 

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Happy 3rd.

Annabella-boo,

Another birthday. 3. For weeks you have been saying, "I turn 3 in June!" And today, when people asked, you said, confidently, "3"!

I love to sit down and reflect on you on your birthday. 3 is a big year! You are signed up for classes without mommy this summer... and preschool begins in the fall. You are so ready. You have incredible social skills, though at random moments, your shy side comes out. As we approach these new steps of independence, ones that I am ready to send you on, I realize just how much we have been together. And I am so grateful. I have been able to watch you through all of your "firsts" and I have been able to watch you develop every step of the way. You are my constant companion. As you have gotten older, I have so appreciated our little "chats".

You are developing into a "big sister"...all the good and sassy. You are starting to include Nora in your activities, asking her to come with you...at times, demanding she come with you. She loves to play by your side..at times, irritating the snot out of you. I am so happy you have her to grow up with, though I know it won't always be easy.

You love to read and read and read. To yourself, to others, to me. And your reading skills are developing. You are recognizing more and more letters...you impress me.

Mostly, I just love you. Though our alone time together is infrequent, it is some of my sweetest memories of the last 6 months.

Little girl, 3 years ago we welcomed you into our family. You have made me better, even at your sassiest. I look ahead to the next year with excitement and anticipation. I look back at the year behind with amazement and pride. These toddler/preschool years are tough, but worth all the pain.

I still pray often and fervently that you will grow into a loving and giving child of God. Grace on you my girl. Grace and peace.

Love you more than my tongue can tell,
Mama

In between baby and toddler

Today she held my hand. This may not seem like much to some moms, but to this mom, it's everything. 

My children are not hand holders or cuddlers. My husband and I aren't really that way, and our kids, even when they were babies, weren't much for cuddling. 

So when they do, time stands still.

We went for a walk. Not far. Just toward the trains. We could hear them clickety-clacking down the tracks at the end of our road, so Annabelle felt that a walk was in order. She's so independent that she walks at least 3 driveways ahead of you.

But Nora is slow. No matter how quickly she shuffles those legs or how hard she pushes out her belly, she is behind. And as her mama, I lag behind with her. 

I reached out my hand to her, and slowly, she wrapped her pudgy fingers around my index finger. I dared not look at her or the moment might just be stolen from me. 

With the sun setting behind us, I could see our shadows. The stark difference in height just made my heart brim over with joy at the thought of the determined look on her face as she was careful over each crack in the sidewalk. 

Today she stayed mostly on course, trying desperately to keep up with "sissy". Usually bending down to dig her finger into an ant hill or curving off into the grass, today we walked together in a straight line. 

The moment didn't last long as Annabelle got impatient and came back looking for us. For a split second, she grabbed my open hand and we walked three across. I literally held my breath. All the thoughts of the lack of sleep, navigating discipline issues, budgets, cleaning, and the crying...all of that faded. I only thought of their hands - Nora holding on to just one of my fingers, Annabelle able to hold my hand now. Straight hair, curly hair. Brunette, blonde. Blue eyes. Both just babies, still. 

And before it started, it was over. Annabelle wanted to hold Nora's hand, which Nora wanted nothing to do with. Annabelle exerted her superiority with a good squeeze and pull. Nora turned around and headed for home while Annabelle darted the other way. All ending in tears as I directed them both the direction we needed to go. 

But no one and nothing can take those brief moments away. My babies are growing up, and I wouldn't have it any other way. But I am trying my hardest to not let moments like those get away without at least a second to reflect on them.